The Health Promotion Board in Singapore states that, “the majority of Singaporean women are infected through sex with their husbands or boyfriends.”
This is a statistical fact.
Unfaithfulness. Betrayal. Infidelity. Sometimes these actions end in dire consequences – the transmission of the dreaded HIV infection or other sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) to your loved ones and family members.
Here is a testimony from an expat woman living in Singapore. She will use a pseudonym, and for good reasons.
I am a 25 year-old heterosexual Caucasian woman who lives each day with HIV.
To the rest of the world, I am a “normal” looking girl, with a “normal” looking life. Yet I am infected with this deadly disease. I often feel that just because I do not fit into the stereotypical demographics of who is at risk and affected by this disease – people feel that what I have to say about HIV doesn’t hold true. It feels like people do not want to hear about HIV and how close it can come to you.
Take a stand for yourself and future generations by consulting an HIV Clinic in Singapore. If left untreated, HIV infection can lead to many other harmful diseases, including AIDS.
Here is my story.
Four years ago, I was a regular 25 year-old woman who was driven to succeed in my career and personal life. I was recently engaged, with a successful career and a bright future ahead of myself. I was well aware of the facts surrounding HIV and that it was a dangerous disease – but never in my life did I consider that I could be infected.
I never thought it would happen to me. But it did.
It all started when I decided that I was going to donate blood for the first time to help contribute to the community and hopefully save someone’s life. I never thought that this trip had in fact saved my own. I went to the hospital, gave blood samples for screening tests, went home, and got on with my life. A few weeks later, a caseworker from the hospital showed up at my house while I was at work. They were met by my fiancé who told me that someone had stopped by and left me a letter. The letter stated that the hospital had an urgent matter to discuss with me and to contact them as soon as possible. So that was exactly what I did.
I began feeling scared after I called the hospital and they would not give me any information over the phone. They told me that it was necessary for me to come by the hospital and talk with them in person. A million things began running through my head. Was there something wrong with my blood? Could it be cancer? An urgent call from the hospital is never really considered “a good thing.” The rest of that day was the longest afternoon of my life. I couldn’t think or concentrate on anything other than my health.
That fateful day, I walked into the hospital with my boyfriend. They would not let him come into the room while they talked to me, even though I told them it would be all right. A female doctor sat me down and said, “We can’t take your blood donation. Are you aware that you’re HIV positive?”
My mind felt like shutting down.
My world came crashing down.
I started to shake. I started to cry. I yelled out NO!
I told the doctor that it couldn’t be true and I demanded to be re-tested. She agreed to test me again and after she left the room to prepare the procedure, I locked eyes with my boyfriend through the glass panel of the counseling room. He was expressionless and even though he saw me crying, he did not seem to be surprised.
My second test confirmed that I was HIV positive. My doctor began to ask me a series of questions and collected information about people that I had been with. She asked me about my boyfriend and I told her that we were together for 4 years and I never cheated. She asked me if I would like to tell him personally and I agreed.
My boyfriend came into the hospital room and I told him the news. He immediately refused to get tested himself and made me leave the hospital immediately. He grabbed my things and got us out of there before I had the chance to do anything. I was too ashamed to tell him to go back.
For the first time in my life, I quietly resigned myself to my fate, put my head down, and cried.
I eventually received my proper medications and constantly asked my boyfriend to get tested as well. He didn’t want to have anything to do with it and he didn’t want any of our friends to know. I stayed in this negative environment for a full year before deciding to leave him and live on my own. To this day, I fully believe that he was the one who gave me HIV and possibly already knew that he was infected.
Till this day, I am still too ashamed to tell my family.
Some of my reflections and advice
I am not what you would consider to be part of the major demographics of people living with HIV. I am not categorized as being a part of a “high-risk” group. I am suffering just like everyone else. My story is no less important.
Although you are probably well aware, there is a negative stigma associated with HIV and the people who are infected by it. I experience it every day. Because of the constant negative thoughts and experiences, those who are suffering from HIV are often ashamed and depressed. Rather than sharing their plight as a warning to others, they withdraw themselves from the world.
Regardless of your demographics or location, you need to get tested for HIV if you have reasons to be suspicious. If I did not choose to donate blood on that fateful day, I could have been much worse off. There are many HIV clinics in Singapore that offer effective and rapid HIV testing procedures.
It is common for us to hear stories in the news about certain largely populated areas being infected with HIV. We put it at the back of our minds and consider ourselves lucky that it isn’t close to home.
It’s unfortunate that we do not receive more coverage on stories of people who are infected with HIV in first-world countries and even in smaller, rural areas. Since these areas with little coverage have lower HIV prevalence, their populations can sometimes be less informed. The people who do eventually become infected whilst living in an unlikely area, are often the ones who are constantly living in fear of becoming ostracized, ridiculed or worse – rejected by their families, friends, and the general public.
If you are living in a city or urbanized area, there are educational programs, pamphlets, billboards, and advertisements that warn the public about the dangers of HIV.
HIV does not discriminate. Every single person – regardless of sex, age, race, and religion – is affected by this epidemic.
Get HIV testing done today in a Singapore clinic. We need to realize that HIV needs to be diagnosed early and treated soonest possible.
What saddens me the most is when I tell people that I’m infected with HIV, they react by saying things like, “No way! You’re so pretty!” or “But you’re a smart girl!”
Yes, it can happen to the girl next door.
I have a strong persona, and every time I see a reaction like this, I can only remind myself that I need to continue speaking out, telling my story to the public, and informing others of the ignorance surrounding HIV.
Now that you know my story – protect yourself. Visit the nearest HIV clinic or STD clinic in Singapore.
Contributed by Anna (a pseudonym)
